


Tresspass

by ManyRelish



Category: Homestuck, Problem Sleuth (Webcomic)
Genre: AU, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-18
Updated: 2011-10-18
Packaged: 2017-10-24 17:54:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/266257
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ManyRelish/pseuds/ManyRelish
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The last thing 16-year-old Percival Stanford expected when his dad was transferred to Midnight City PD was to get caught up with a gang leader and cray aliens threatening to take over the world. Perhaps he's a bit in over his head.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tresspass

**Author's Note:**

> WOO! Back to writing my 8K word 3rd person fanfictions! Yeah, it kinda suck in areas, and I still can't make myself write lemons, but uh... yeah. I hope it's okay. Enjoy.
> 
> I once again I suffer from CANTTITLEANYTHING disorder.

“Well, what do we have here?”

The last thing Percival Stanford expected when he moved to Midnight City was to find himself backed against a wall with a knife at his neck. Yet here he was, backed against a wall with a knife at his neck and staring wide-eyed at the gang that had apparently made their name known to every guy on the planet except him. Yeah, so everyone knew of the Midnight Crew except him. Terrific!

Rather, not terrific, because now he was being questioned/threatened for why he's on MC territory. Go figure. He was too young to die. He hadn't even graduated high school!

“J..just a passerby,” Percy managed to choke out, the knife got a little closer to his throat and he could almost feel it's cool edge on his skin.

“Right,” says the holder. Percy recognized him from school. He was that senior taking all the AP courses. Who'd have thought he was in a gang? Wasn't he planning on going to med school or something? Well, that was what Percy heard in the two weeks he'd been going to Midnight High School. His name was... something. Damien something-or-other. “No one just 'passes by' us.”

“Sorry. New kid. Don't know.”

“Bull--” started Damien, but he was cut off by the short, skinny guy in the back.

“Hold on.”

Oh. He was in Percy's history class. His name was Jack Noir or something. French. Percival was a french name, maybe he should bring up that correlation.

Jack approached him, eyes narrowed and hands behind his back. “I know you,” he said. “You're that new kid. Guess you wouldn't know, then, would you.”

“Like I said,” Percy gasped, “passerby.”

“Didn't look like it,” Damien hissed, but backed off a bit. Percy let out a breath he didn't know he was holding.

“Okay, so I was investigating. A lot of people have been going missing, that's why we were transferred here and--”

“You think we did it?” Jack asked, though it was more like a snarl. Percy was made very aware of just how close Jack was. He could feel the other's hot breath on his face, and it sent terrified shivers down his spine.

“No! No, I'm not pointing fingers! I just like poking my nose where it doesn't belong,” Percy said desperately.

Jacked smirked. “Fancy yourself a sleuth, huh?”

“I dabble.” Truthfully he'd dabbled so much that he couldn't really call himself a dabbler anymore, but that was not going to save his head in this situation.

“Well, Sleuth, tell me this. What's gonna happen if you don't get your ass out of here in two seconds?”

“You'll invite me over to tea and scones?”

Jack laughed. It's was the most terrifying sound Percy'd ever heard, like a bunch of knives clattering to the ground. He felt all his blood run cold, and his face turned pale, eliciting a couple snickers from the other Crew members.

“You're funny, Sleuth, I like you.” Percy didn't think he could be anymore horrified in his life. “Yeah, why don't you come over for tea and scones? It'll be a killer time.” Percy nearly fainted. In fact, his knees did buckle and he had to catch himself with the wall to prevent form falling over, creating more laughter from the Crew. “Catch my drift?”

“I-I'm catching it...”

“Good. Now don't come around these parts again!” Jack snapped, then stalked off as the Crew followed him out. Percy didn't recognize the other two, but then again he didn't try to. He just got the hell out of there as fast as he could because he did not want to have a killer time with the crew. Ever.

* * *

“When I offered to help you out, I didn't expect to see you get messed up with the Crew,” Holly Doverly snapped. Percy rubbed his head and glanced around nervously.

“It's not like I walked over to them and said, 'Hi, I'm Percival and I'd like you to threaten to stab me'.”

“You might as well have, you went on their turf!”

“Well, how was I supposed to know?”

Holly groaned and shook her head. Percy was not winning this argument. Girls are always right, that was a law of nature. The bell rang then, so there were no more chances for Holly to yell at him for fucking up in less than a month. And Percy had to go to history. Dear god.

There were three people absent from class that day. One was Jack Noir. Percy thought he was going to be okay until Jack walked in just as the bell rang, spotted Percy, and forced the quiet kid sitting next to him to “get the hell out of the way” so the two could sit together. The teacher didn't even bother with it, apparently Jack sat where he wanted and where he wanted to sit was next to Percival Stanford. Percy thought he was about to die.

“Heh, I knew it was worth showing up to class today!” Jack said with a grin. God, Percy nearly wet himself. It must have been obvious. “You're amusing, kid, I like you. Don't believe we've been formerly introduced. The name's Jack Noir, but call me Spades Slick.”

“Can I call you Jack?”

“Spades Slick.” There was something in his voice that made Percy want to comply to that request.

“Okay, Slick, I'm Percival.”

“That's too long, I'm calling you Sleuth.”

“Seems rather impersonal doesn't it?”

“Nah.”

It was then that Percy noticed the whole class—including the teacher—was staring at them. Ja—Slick was ignoring them completely. Apparently it was a weird thing for him to converse casually with some dumb new kid. And how old was J—Slick, anyway? At least 18, and a Junior in high school? Percy decided not to bring it up. He didn't want to die as a 16-year-old virgin who'd only kissed one girl in his whole life and it was that cute neighbor girl from back home right before he left for Midnight City. Damn he'd do anything to see he again. But no, he wasn't going to. He was going to die by Spades Slick's hands and he was sure of it.

“If you're done,” the teacher started, though Percy couldn't help but notice the hesitation in her voice, “I'd like to start the lesson.”

“Yeah, we're done, toots. Calm your tits.”

“Mister Noir--”

“Don't you have teaching to do?”

There was no more conversation between the teacher and Slick.

* * *

“Doesn't it bother you?” Percy asked, looking around at the seven people missing from class. “I mean, these people are disappearing and their bodies aren't even being found!”

“Eh,” Slick replied, leaning back in his chair with a bored expression on his face. “What's it to me?”

“Well, I dunno, but there's gotta be something in you that cares.”

“Nope.”

Percy sighed. It was true that he'd gotten more used to speaking to Jack Noir/Spades Slick in the last three weeks, but he wasn't about to start calling him out on not caring. The guy was still a cold-hearted bastard who'd kill for the hell of it. At least, Percy was pretty sure he was.

“Look, people have been absent before, kid. Y'know, flu season and stuff.”Slick waived his hand in the air.

“It's March,” Percy muttered. “Besides, they're all missing persons. I saw it on my dad's desk at home.”

“Hmm?”

“Y'know, cause he's a cop.”

“Shit, you're old man's a badge?”

“Well, yeah. That's why we moved here. Missing persons.”

“Damn.”

Percy sighed. His father was making no progress on the case. Things were looking bad.

When Percy got home he found his father pacing in the kitchen-den. Not that there was much room to pace anywhere in the shitty apartments of Midnight City. Percy dropped his bag in his room, telling himself he should just leave it alone. Leave it alone, Percy, you shouldn't get involved. You've already gotten in trouble once for sleuthing around. In the end he couldn't fight it and asked what the problem was.

“We found something. A warehouse. It wasn't all that noticeable, but at night it gives off this faint eerie glow. You wouldn't see it unless you stared at it for a long time.”

“Where is it?”

“No.”

“No what?”

“No, you are not going there and sleuthing!” Percy huffed. “Percy, I know it's hard for you to avoid sticking your nose in places it doesn't belong, but I don't want to lose you. After you're mother--”

He stopped and looked away. Percy sighed. He didn't remember his mother too well, but his dad really had trouble getting over it.

“I won't go,” Percy said. “Won't even ask anymore.” There was a grin on his face as he turned and went back to his room. There were many ways to find out where the warehouse was located.

* * *

Percy did not own a lot of black, but he did have a black sweatshirt and sweat pants. Sleuthing at night wasn't uncommon for him, but at his age he needed to blend in so as not to be caught by any unwanted eyes. Particularly his father's. Dad worked night shifts, which was the only reason why Percy was able to sneak out at night. Otherwise he'd have his father's eyes on him 24/7.

This particular evening he had a distinct plan: get to the warehouse. He'd found some information about it on his dad's desk at home and looked the rest up on the internet. Good old internet. He'd found the place, all quarantined and taped off, but it was easy to sneak under police eyes. A lot of the time they didn't even care. What he didn't expect, however was to have someone sneak up behind him and comment on his dress.

“You look good in black.”

Percy jumped and spun around, finding himself face-to-face with Spades Slick. “Oh hey.”

“What'd I tell you about sneaking around our territory?”

“You're curious, too. That's why you're here, right?”

Slick scowled. He was dressed head to toe in black, as well, but it was a suit. He looked good in a suit. Wait, why did Percy think that?

“Are you coming with me or not?” he asked to distract himself from staring at Slick in a suit. Funny how fancy dress can make a guy so much more appealing. Slick shrugged and followed Percy under the caution tape. They had to creep through the police guard, which wasn't too hard except when Slick offered to kill one of them and Percy shot him a glare.

“I like how they all stand outside and look at the building rather than coming inside,” Slick muttered as the two slipped safely inside the warehouse. It wasn't much of a warehouse, actually. It had a maze of corridors on the outside edges, and, who knew, maybe it was just a maze all the way through.

“Yeah, apparently they sent someone in and he never came back, never even radioed.”

“Probably got lost.”

“Slick, he never radioed anyone. They couldn't reach him at all.”

Slick shrugged and began walking down a hall, refusing to speak anymore. It was probably for the best, whatever was stealing people away was definitely in here. They stuck to the shadows, mostly, in case there was any secret surveillance (like microscopic cameras. Slick thought it was bull, but Sleuth insisted.). Eventually it became so dark neither of them could see. And after Slick snarled something about bumping into Percy for the third time, Percy reached out and grabbed his hand.

“Look, I know it's gay or whatever, but this way we'll know where the other is,” he said, ignoring the warm feeling on his hand as best he could. For some reason he thought touching slick would be akin to touching ice. Dry ice. Or liquid nitrogen. But his temperature was normal for a human, and thinking about it was making Percy blush. Hell, he was holding hands with a guy, he could blush. The fact that Slick wasn't exactly a limp noodle on his end definitely added to that effect.

Percy had never ruled out the idea of liking other guys, but he never really thought about it, either.

It was at that point that he heard something coming. Footsteps, and mumbling with lots of harsh sounds and clicks. Percy felt himself dragged back into a narrow corridor and pressed against the wall. And then the heat of another pressed against his. Of course it was natural the flatten the two of them together and make them as small as possible. Percy's heart was pounding. Whatever was there was dangerous since it'd been stealing people away. As much as he'd hate to admit it, he was scared. He was terrified and the only thing keeping him from flipping his shit was Slick pressed against him.

The voices had become louder and more distinct. It was obvious they were speaking a different language. One sounded more feminine than the other, though both voices were harsh and menacing. Just when it seemed like they were in the clear, the footsteps stopped.

“I smell humans,” hissed the masculine voice. It was heavily accented, similar to a german or russian accent.

“Looks like we've got mice,” the female giggled.

They were speaking english, which meant they were deliberately trying to scare the boys pressed against the wall.

“I'll take care of them,” the female said and strolled into the dark corridor. “Don't you worry you're pretty little head, Dualscar.”

Percy gave Slick a shove, and no more was needed than that. The two were running away from those things as fast as they could. It was still dark, but there was a bit of light streaming in from a crack on the wall so things were easier to see. Such as the corner they'd just put themselves in. There was no way out. And behind them came the female whatever-she-was, grinning like a kid in a candy store and swinging around one of those pirate-sword thingies. Percy couldn't recollect the official name.

“Well, well, well, what do I have here?” she asked, her grin widening and showing her sharp fangs. They almost glowed. The rest of her was odd, as well. Her hair was black, long and unkempt, falling to her waist. Her skin was gray, her eyes orange, and she had horns. They... really looked like candy corn. Percy really wanted some candy corn just then. Last thing to eat before he died. “Two little humans snuck their way in, huh? You know what we did for the others who came by?”

“Offered them awesome alien merchandise?” Percy asked, his voice quavering a bit. He was a sixteen-year-old kid, how could he fight this woman... thing?

“We culled them, kid. Slit their throats and watched their disgusting red blood pour all over the ground. It was fantastic!” She laughed. Percy took back what he said about Slick's laugh, her laugh was the most terrifying thing he'd ever heard. He felt something touch his hand, the handle of something. Percy gave a quick glance down to see a knife placed there, given to him by Slick. Slick was determined not to die here, huh? Well, Percy would just have to suck up his fear and face this bitch.

“That'll get you thrown in the slammer for murder,” Percy commented.

“Like a human could overpower me! I'm the Marquisee Spinneret Mindfang, and you don't stand a chance against me.” She laughed again, a sound that sent shivers down Percy's spine.

He had to keep talking, to lure her into a state of security or something so he and Slick could attack. “What about your own people? You must have a justice system for murder.”

“Kid, we're Trolls! We live to kill. It's against the law to not murder!” Mindfang grinned at them. “And I'm going to add you to the pile of bodies to feed to Her Imperial Condescension’s lovely Gl'bgolyb .”

Percy did not want to know what a Gl'bgolyb was, nor did he want to know what it's insides were like. Apparently neither did Slick, since her burst into action at that moment. It was almost surprising how fast he was. Then again, he was short and skinny, so speed would logically be his advantage. The Marquise was taken by surprise at this, she didn't think they'd fight back. Slick managed to get a jab to her side, though it was shallow, before she punched him back.

“Ugh! Stupid humans!” She looked down at the wound. So did Percy. Her blood was blue. It was a majestic blue color, almost beautiful and the same color as the designs on her dress. Holy shit, alien blood was weird. “Your kind will pay for this. This planet will be ruled by us, and the Condesce will take it as her knew throne!”

She lashed out at slick with her blade this time, going directly for the kill, but Percy managed to stop her by sinking his knife into her back, just to the right of her spine. He was a bit unskilled in knife fights. He'd used a knife before (his father made him learn after his mother's death), but he was much better with a gun. Now was not the time to thinking about guns and how much he wished he had one, though.

“So the other idiot can fight, too,” she hissed, spinning around and swatting Percy away. Slick attacked them, once again faster than she expected. He got the blade right into her gut, and she hissed in pain before grabbing him by the throat and shoving him to the wall.

“Stupid humans,” she growled. “Ridiculous, you think you can stop me? I won't be so easy on you now.”

The Marquise put a hand to her head, concentrating hard on something. Percy backed up instinctively, thinking she was summoning some kind of Troll monster to eat them. But then she released Slick, and he sort of slumped against the wall for a moment before pushing off and facing Percy. There was a symbol on his forehead, looked like the Scorpio horoscope sign. Percy realized that Mindfang had the same symbol on her forehead, and she was grinning devilishly.

Slick lunged at Percy, a little clumsier than before, but still quick and exact. Percy flinched as the knife hit his left arm. Holy shit!

“Slick, what are you doing?” he asked, but Slick didn't respond and attacked again. His movements were slower than before, giving Percy just enough time to dodge any fatal blows.

“It's no use, he's caught under my spell. There's no way to free him unless you kill him.” Mindfang snickered.

No, Percy couldn't kill Slick. He'd never killed anything before! He settled on trying his best to block with his own knife, but that only made him lose it when Slick sliced his hand. Percy backed up, eyes darting desperately to the knife on the ground, to Mindfang, to Slick. He couldn't kill Slick, he couldn't kill anything. He didn't even have a weapon. Slick got him pinned against the wall, a black expression on his face as he drew the knife up and pressed it to Percy's jaw. Oh god, the Marquise was just having fun with it now. Percy reached to his belt, hoping to find something—anything--that could help him. He found his keys. His god damn house keys. What good were these things? Still, his urgency increased when he felt the cold metal slice his skin, and something hot drip down his leg. In an act of desperation, Percy swatted at Slick's hand with the keys. He didn't knock the knife away, but the keys felt heavier, and didn't jingle. Percy look at them. He didn't have keys.

He had a gun.

The Marquise looked surprised at this, then smiled. “So you do have a chance at life. Kill your matesprit or die yourself, human.”

Percy had no idea what a matesprit was, but quite frankly he didn't care. He pointed the gun at Slick's head. Sorry, Slick, there was just no other way. Or was there? If Mindfang couldn't keep her concentration, she couldn't keep Slick under her mind control. He'd have to do it fast or she'd catch on. Percy bit his lip, pivoted his gun, and fired.

The bullet hit the Marquise square on the chest. Her eyes widened, and she just stared at Sleuth for a while. He was terrified it didn't work, but he noticed the symbol on her forehead was gone. And then he felt Slick's body slump against his a bit.

“Slick, she's vulnerable!” Percy hissed. Before he'd even finished, Slick was running at her. He grabbed her horn and yanked her head down, eyes cold.

“How did you say you killed those people?” he asked, a grin sneaking on to his face. She didn't respond. “Oh, you forgot, let me remind you.” And then he slit her throat.

All Percy could do was stare. Holy... holy shit. Slick was terrifying, standing in a pool of blue alien blood and grinning like he... Like he enjoyed it. He dropped her, letting her body fall to the ground with a wet plop.

“That takes care of that,” Slick said, looking at the blood on his hands with mild disgust.

“Wait!” Percy said. He stepped forward, kneeling beside Mindfang and dipping his fingers into her blood and writing on the wall.

THIS IS A WARNING. GET OUT.

Slick let out a chuckle, though it seemed more approving than mocking. “Let's get out of here, kid.”

The two sneaked out through a window, which was relatively less guarded than doors. It was exhilarating, sneaking out at night against his father's wishes, encountering hostile aliens, killing one of them and leave a warning.

Percy stopped.

Slick looked back.

Percy fell, barely managing to catch himself.

“Hey! What the fuck is your problem?” Slick asked, trying his hardest not to sound concerned at all.

The adrenaline from the adventure had worn off, now all that was left of exhaustion and cold, harsh reality.

“I just killed something...”

“What?”

“I just killed something, Slick! It was alive, and now it's dead, and it's because of me!”

“Hey, don't take all the credit, I delivered the finishing blow.”

Percy looked up at Slick with a horrified expression, and Slick looked surprised, shocked almost. Percy's head fell again.

“I'm gonna be sick,” he muttered, raising a hand to his mouth. He stopped, since it was still coating in troll blood. Percy managed to keep himself from puking as Slick walked over and pulled him to his feet.

“Yeah, c'mon. You need a ride home or something? God, I don't do this 'caring' thing so don't get used to it, okay? I'm not gonna hold your hand every time you kill something,” Slick muttered.

Percy looked at him again with that same expression. “I'm going to do it again?”

Oh snap, Slick blew it. Percy looked good in black. Really damn good, and Slick would have liked to see it on this kid more often. Obviously joining the Midnight Crew wasn't on his mind. Better cover it. “Yeah, y'know, there's more of those things.”

“This is... This is way too big for us,” Percy replied, though he was a bit more relaxed.

“And you think those a-holes in the police force can handle it?”

“Hey! My dad's on that...” his voice trailed off.

Slick sighed and hauled Percy to his car. He was amazed, to say the least, commenting several times with “THIS IS YOURS? HOW THE HELL DO YOU AFFORD A CAR LIKE THIS? HOLY FUCK.” Slick could only smirk, glad Percy seemed forget about what he'd just done. Not because he was worried about the kid, of course, but he did not want puke on his car. It was bad enough that he was getting alien blood on the wheel, but that didn't smell like... stomach acid or whatever. That seemed to wear off by the time they reached his house, Percy stumbled inside, and promptly threw up in the sink. Twice.

* * *

School the next day was pretty terrible. Percy wouldn't have gone, but he had a test in math class and he figured he should just stay the rest of the day. He wasn't sure if he wanted to see Slick or not, but he found he didn't have a choice when the gangster was absent from class that day. Percy had to admit, he was a bit worried about Slick. Slick had taken a beating last night, thrown against a wall several times or something like that. He sighed and slid down in his seat, trying to keep from remembering the events that happened the previous night. He'd only get sick again, and that.... That was terrible. He was not going to puke in class.

The day had been tediously long, but finally Percy was walking home with one strap of his backpack thrown lazily over his shoulder. He must have looked terrible, because someone commented on it.

“You look terrible,” Slick said, leaning against a building with a bored expression on his face.

“You don't,” Percy replied. “Where were you today?”

“Taking a day off. That bitch had one hell of an arm.” Slick rubbed his side tentatively.

Percy let out a small chuckle. “Yeah, I guess she did, huh.”

“Hey, I wanna show you something,” Slick said, turning around and walking away from Percy. The boy followed him without a second thought.

Slick led him halfway across town, then into an apartment complex that was at least 14 stories high. Percy had never hated stares so much in his life, though Slick had warned him thoroughly before hand that the stares were dangerous. So when he slipped and bruised his shin, all Slick said was, “I warned you about the stairs.” They were reaching the top floor when Percy finally decided to say something.

“Do you live here?”

“In this dump? Nah.”

Percy would hardly describe the complex as a dump. He and his dad were living in a shittier place that this. Finally the stairs stopped, and Slick opened the only door there was on the highest level, leading to the roof. Percy was shocked. It had a beautiful view of Midnight City, and the sun was just lowering in the sky, leaving a slight orange hue to the buildings stretched out before them.

“You seemed pretty upset, or whatever, so I thought I'd remind you what you're fighting for,” Slick said, rubbing his head as Percy approached the side of the building and hooked his fingers in the chain link fence that was placed around the perimeter to prevent suicides. “If those things take over, none of this will stay here.”

“Slick are you comforting me?” Percy asked, looking back at him with a gentle smile on his face.

“Yeah, well, don't get used to it! I don't do this 'caring' thing, alright?” Slick's face was slightly red, though Percy took the courtesy of pretending it was due to the sunset.

“Okay, Slick,” Percy said with a small chuckle, “I won't get used to it.”

“Good!”

Percy looked back at Midnight City, taking in the view. “It's beautiful.”

“I'm going to run this place some day,” Slick muttered.

“Yeah? As the best mobster ever?”

“It's in my blood.”

Percy tilted his head a bit.

“The Noir family built this city from nothing. We made it what it is today, but the politicians like to believe that it's them keeping things pieced together.”

“It's not?”

“No way, kid, it's totally us. And it will be me once I get the fuck out of that damn school. I don't care about it, so they just keep me there, it's like a neverending cycle.”

“And you're the laundry?”

“What?”

Percy giggled, not the most manly thing to do, but he couldn't help himself. “You know, laundry cycles.”

“Hey, I'm not someone's damn underwear, Sleuth!”

“I was thinking more like dirty socks.”

Slick punched him, though it certainly wasn't with full force. Percy couldn't stop laughing, even as Slick smacked him, shook him, and yelled at him repeatedly. He started tuning Slick's voice out and just grinned at him with the goofiest smile he could muster. Slick shoved him against the fence and pinned him there, glaring at him.

“Hey, are you even listening to me, you shitstain?”

“No, not really,” Percy replied.

Slick glared at him for a really long time, trying to stay angry though his expression betrayed his confusion. “Why the hell are you smiling?”

“I dunno.”

“Stop it.”

“I can't.”

Slick let out a sound similar to a growl, and for an instant Percy was afraid he'd get fucked up. But then Slick's hands were on his face, and he was yanked forward into the most awkward and terrible kiss ever. It was too rough, and Slick's teeth cut Percy's lip, and it was just bad over all, but... But a little part of him liked it. So he closed his eyes and leaned against Slick until he was shoved back against the chain link fence.

“There, now you're not smiling anymore, idiot,” Slick growled. It was true, Percy wasn't smiling, but he wasn't upset that it'd just happened. He was a bit shocked, however, and his mouth was hanging open and bleeding. Slick turned and stalked away, probably trying to hide his embarrassment or something. Percy could only stand there and watch him go as he waited for his limbs to start receiving signals from his brain to move again.

That only happened after Slick was gone.

* * *

He didn't know how his father found out, but a week later Percy found himself sitting awkwardly on the couch in the living room while his father lectured him on the terrible thing he did sneaking off and investigating a police site with some stupid friend of his. Percy was only half paying attention, he was more focused on the fact that he'd been seen. They'd been so careful! And why did the person wait to snitch on them until now? He shook his head.

“Honestly, Percival, are you even listening to me? It's dangerous out there, okay? I've already lost your mother to the Felt, I'm not losing you, too!”

Percy really wished his mother would stop being mentioned. He didn't even remember her. As for the Felt, they were scary, but when you grow up in the city of English, you just get used to them and their crazy timey-wimey bullshit.

“Look, dad, it's not that I don't care or anything, but seriously, is it worth lecturing me over something I did a week ago and haven't done since?”

“So you admit you did it!”

“Oh my god!” Percy face palmed. With both hands. Face palm x2 combo.

“Percival, do you know how disappointed I am?”

“Yes, we've gone through this twice already!”

“I don't think you're taking this seriously!”

“Dad! By God, how can I take this seriously when your argument is the same every time? 'Mom died this way so I don't want you doing anything like it.' That's your argument every time. Did it ever occur to you that maybe she was unprepared? Maybe there was some kind of deal?”

“Percival--”

“I don't even remember her, so how am I suppose to feel sorry for her? You had a choice to live in English, you know, and you decided to stay there. It's not unheard of for a cop to live in a city that's not the one he patrols, you know!”

“Percival--”

“I'm tired of it, okay? I'm tired of you trying to run my life because you think I'll end up just like her. Tons of people die for terrible reasons, does it mean it's any more likely for me to die like them? Or is it just because you knew her?”

“Percival, shut up!”

Percival did shut up. He just stood there and looked at the other man, the two of them fuming.

“Don't you dare say things like that about her--” his father started.

“Fuck this,” Percy muttered and stormed to his room, tuning out his name being screamed over and over again.

He slammed his door in a very dramatic way, then looked the door and flopped on his bed and just glared at the ceiling with all his might. He really needed to get out of the house. It was only so long before his dad found the key to his room and ended up shooting the doorknob off. But how the hell was he gonna get out of here?

“That was a nice argument.”

Percy bolted upright, his eyes going towards the window. There was Spades Slick, leaning on the outside window sill with his nose pressed against the glass. In an instant Percy was on his feet and yanking the glass pane open.

“Slick, what the hell? This is the second story!”

“Yeah, well, I can climb.” Slick smirked.

“Well, jesus, come inside or something before you fall and kill yourself!”

“I'd rather not. Something about being in the same building as a cop makes me nervous. Let's get out of here.” Slick leaned forward, his grin almost literally from ear to ear. Percy felt a bit intimidated.

“And go where?”

Slick's smirk—miraculously—widened. “Where do you think?”

In a matter of seconds, Percy grabbed his black hoodie and followed Slick out the window. There was a lot of scrambling and nearly falling, but he finally made it to the ground (mostly) unharmed. Just then he heard the blast of his doorknob being shot off, so he shoved Slick along and the two of them ran almost giddily through the streets.

As for the warehouse/labyrinth itself, it was less guarded at that time of the day, and the cops were rather lazy, sneaking past them was easy. Once inside, however, Percy began to rethink what he was doing.

“Hold on, Slick,” he said, though Slick didn't hold on so they just continued walking through the darkness. “Maybe this isn't such a good idea. We almost died last time, and we know for sure there's at least one other troll thingy in this place. From the sound of it, he's male, and statistics say that males are stronger than females and--”

“Shut up, Sleuth, all your blabbering is going to get us caught!”

“I'm serious Slick!”

Just then Slick grabbed Percy and yanked him into a small dent in the wall. Percy heard what he'd reacted to moments later. The heavy footsteps of a troll wandering around.

“I know you are back, humans, and you will pay for what you did to Mindfang!”

Yeah, same troll from last time. This wasn't a very good hiding spot, so both of them started running at the same instant. It was like they were on the same wavelength, Percy would have gone on and on about it had he not been preoccupied with running from a terrifying troll alien monster.

It was obvious the troll—Dualscar or whatever—had heard them run, but he hadn't seen where they'd gone. Percy yanked Slick into thin corridor and pulled him close. The stakes were high again, and this troll... he seemed like he wouldn't be as cocky as Mindfang. Perhaps he took their warning and decided they were worthy opponents and not toys. Either way, it was bad news.

“We're probably not gonna survive this time,” Percy whispered to Slick.

“Where are you little humans?” Dualscar called, and the boys back further into the darkness.

“No shit, Sherlock,” Slick hissed back.

“I thought I was Sleuth.” Percy pouted a bit.

“Just shut it.”

His heart was already pounding, so there wasn't much of a change there when Slick kissed him. Yeah, they were probably going to die, but at least they weren't alone. Percy closed his eyes, sliding his arms around Slick's neck and pulling him closer. Slick's hands slid to his waist, and soon simple kissing had gone to sloppy makeout sessions. Quiet sloppy makeout sessions, if they made any noise, Dualscar would hear them. Percy had a hard time holding back the moan that threatened to escape his throat when Slick's tongue worked it's way into his mouth. He tilted his head a bit, sliding fingers into Slick's hair and letting out a small whimper.

“Jesus,” Slick hissed against Percy's mouth.

Then someone cleared their throat.

Both boys broke apart with amazing speed and stared in horror at Dualscar.

“As much as I'd love to watch the mating ritual of you worthless humans, I'm afraid I'll have to capture you and take you to the Condesce,” Dualscar growled, grabbing Slick and Percy by their collars.

“You're not going to kill us here?” Percy asked, stalling as Slick reached for one of his knives.

“I'd like to, but Her Imperial Condescension wishes to see the ones who killed the Marquise.” Dualscar shoved Slick into the wall. “No funny business or I'll kill your matesprit.”

“What the hell is a matesprit?” Slick demanded.

“Oh, then you don't mind?” Percy felt a hand clench on the back of his neck, squeezing tightly and painfully. His breath hitched.

“Fuck,” Slick hissed. “Fine. Okay. No need for that or... whatever...” His face was red again, embarrassed for showing compassion. Dualscar made an approving noise and loosened his grip on Percy's neck.

“Now then, Her Imperial Condescension wishes to see you worthless beings.” His face was smug, and he looked so proud of himself for coming up with such a great insult.

* * *

Her Imperial Condescension was probably the scariest thing Percy had seen so far. Her lips were pursed and her eyes angry as the two of them were thrown to the ground. She also looked bored, leaning her elbow on the arm of her... throne? What that a throne?

“So these were the humans who killed Marquise Spinneret Mindfang?” She sounded disappointed.

“Afraid so, your Highness,” Dualscar replied.

“Very well, thank you Orphaner Dualscar,” she said, waiving him away. “I'm not really sure what to do with them, honestly. I'll have to think about it. Lock them up or something.”

“Wouldn't it be a good idea to kill them, Condesce?” Dualscar asked.

“SILENCE, DUALSCAR! Are you questioning me?” Dualscar's gray skin when pale. “No? Good, I'm glad we're at an understanding. _Now lock them up while I think about what to do with them._ ”

Dualscar hurried over to Percy and shoved him along. Slick was about ready to go on a murdering spree, but a third troll came out of the darkness. He was sweating profusely, and looking right at Slick.

“Should I... deal with the resistant one, your Highness?” he asked.

“Oh, Executioner Darkleer, how kind of you to offer. Yes, rough him up a bit, but don't kill him. I need to think of a punishment suitable for their crimes.”

Percy was thrown in the cell while Slick was lead elsewhere. He was terrified, his limbs hurt, and now he didn't even have Slick to cling to. Percy groaned and pressed his head against the glass. Damn it, what good was he? He wasn't much of a fighter or even a sleuth. He couldn't keep them hidden... Well, to be honest they were kind of... Percy's thoughts trailed off. That's right. He'd been making out with Slick. Percy's fingers drifted up to his lips, but wait! No, this wasn't the time to be thinking about how fucking amazing it is to make out with Spades Slick. He needed to get out of here. Percy spent what felt like hours—but was probably only thirty minutes—examining his confinement. It was square, no bars or anything. It had what looked like a glass wall on one side where the door was. The rest of it was a concrete-like material. Percy grabbed his keys and shot the wall. Not a scratch. There was no way out.

Just then Slick was thrown into the cell. Percy ran to his side, helping him off his feet.

“You okay?” he asked.

“Peachy, now where the hell are we and how the hell do we get out?”

The door slammed behind them. “It just closed.” Slick reached for a knife. “Seriously, Slick, I shot the wall. There's no way a knife could--”

“Shut up, they took em all, anyway.” Slick wiped some blood from his mouth.

“Are you sure you're okay?”

“Yeah, the huge alien thing kept saying I looked like I'd break if he tried to hit me.”

“So he didn't hit you?”

“He did. Only once, though. Then he took all my goddamn weapons.” Slick growled.

Percy smiled and, before he could think, gave Slick a chaste kiss.

“The hell was that for?” Slick asked.

Percy felt his face heat up. “Oh, uh, I just...”

They were kissing again in a matter of moments, hands wandering everywhere. This would probably be the last affection either of them would ever get, at least that was Percy's reasoning as Slick pushed him against the wall and slid a hand under his shirt.

Oh wait. “This probably isn't such a good idea,” Percy muttered when Slick's lips moved to Percy's neck. “Slick, I'm serious, this--” Slick bit him, and he moaned in response. Oh god, okay this was... well it hurt but in a good way. Like what you'd see in porn but never think you'd actually like.

“You were saying?” Slick growled and continued to do just whatever the hell he wanted to Percy's neck.

“I-I just... they've got to be monitoring us so...”

“Let 'em watch.”

“I'd rather my first be in private..”

Slick snorted at that.

And then the door was shoved open and they were yanked off each other and back to the Condesce.

* * *

“I know what I want to do with you idiots,” Her Imperial Condescension said after they were thrown in front of her. “I'm going to throw you into the furthest ring and see what the horrorterrors do to you.” Her smile was frightening, this and delicate but deadly. Incredibly deadly. “Perhaps they'll eat your minds!” She laughed a bit then, her sharp teeth glinting in the dim light.

Percy found himself strapped to some kind of machine, being poked with many things until everything went black. Then there was nothing. Nothing but darkness. Percy shivered, hugging his arms to himself. His mind drifted a bit, wandered to how good it felt to have Slick's lips on his, their arms wrapped around each other, the taste of blood and stale cigarettes... Something grabbed him. He nearly shrieked as cool tentacles slid around his middle. There was a cooing in his head, followed by a lot of harsh and indescribable noises. Percy didn't think he could replicate the noises if he tried. Then something reached to him. Something warm. The creatures shied away from him as the warmth grabbed his limbs. And then there was a blinding green light.

* * *

Slick struggled against the tentacles binding him. “The fuck are you? Let me go!” He hissed. The voices in his head wouldn't stop, hisses and growls and something else.

“I swear to fucking god if you don't let me go, I'm going to kill you!” He jerked against their grip, but they held. A single tendril touched his forehead.

“Such anger, a gift.”

Slick jolted awake, straining against the bindings holding him to the whateveritwas holding him. “Let me go!” he hissed at the Condesce.

“Oh, looks like one survived. How dull.” She examined her nails.

Sur..Survived? Slick's eyes drifted to Percy's body beside him. Limp. Not breathing. There was only rage then, pure unrivaled rage. All he felt was hatred and the need to destroy. His hands felt hot, but the straps were gone in seconds.

“Die bitch!” he snarled, darting towards the Condesce. Dualscar got in his way immediately, halting him with his gun and being very careful not to touch him. But why? Slick looked at his hands. They were... on fire. Purple fire. Odd, but, hell if it'd help him out he'd just have to deal with it. He yanked Dualscar's massive gun from his hands and tossed it aside. “Move.”

There was a sharp pain in his shoulder, and when he looked he saw it was an arrow. Darkleer was on him a second later.

“No one will hurt Her Imperial Condescension,” Darkleer growled. The Condesce smiled at him.

Darkleer grabbed Slick and tossed him across the room like he was a doll, watching him slam into the wall and hiss in pain. Dualscar was the next to attack Slick, giving him barely enough time to dodge the punch aimed for his face. Darkleer fired another arrow, hitting Slick in the leg, and Dualscar hit him in the side. Slick was clearly outnumbered and outmatched. He didn't have the strength or numbers these guys had. Neither did he have the skill. He could, perhaps, take them down in ten or fifteen years after ruling the city with an iron fist.

Then something else grabbed their attention. Everyone turned to look at the supposedly dead boy, who was now glowing green, gaining armor and sword, growing wings, and ripping out of his restraints. Dualscar and Darkleer both abandoned Slick and ran towards him, only to get shoved aside. Dualscar grabbed his gun and fired, barely missing Percy. Darkleer shot an arrow and hit him, but he pulled it out like it was a splinter and sliced through the sweaty Troll seconds later. There was blue blood everywhere, spilling from the troll and pooling on the ground. But that wasn't the most surprising thing to Slick. The most surprising thing was that Percy wasn't bleeding. Well he was, but it wasn't blood.

It was ink.

Dualscar fired again, and Percy dodged it flawlessly before beheading him. It was amazing. He was so incredibly graceful, even when beheading crazy horned aliens. Percy turned to the Condesce, who had risen from her throne. He flew at her, and she knocked him back with her 2x3dent. Their movements quickened, clashing swords and 2x3dents, splatters of ink and pink blood on the ground. At one point it was impossible to see them, they were moving so fast. But something was off. Percival was slowing, and the Condesce looked barely fatigued.

“You're dying,” she replied with an icy smile. “You're killing yourself with this power.”

“And where will I be if I don't use it?” Percy growled back, his voice was strange, almost god-like.

The Condesce's smiled faded. “Oh. Well, if you're going to be like that--”

“If I'm going to die, I'm at least going to bring you down with me!” Percy snarled, darting at her. She readied her 2x3dent, but it was too late. His sword pierced through her chest.

“I suppose I could say the same them, hmm?” she told him before he yanked the sword out of her and she collapsed into a pink bloody mess. Percy followed her soon after. Slick scrambled to his side.

“Holy shit, Sleuth, that was fucking amazing!” he gasped. There was no response. “Sleuth? Hey, hey wait she wasn't serious, was she?” Slick rolled Percy over. Still no response. “Hey! Sleuth! I'm fucking talking to you! God, fuck, what's you're name, Perri the Platypus! Uh... Percival, whatever, look, just look at me and tell me she was lying!”

The hatred was gone, there was only something else that felt terrible and cold and it hurt a lot. He kind of knew what it was, but he didn't want to admit it. There was the sound of footsteps as several cops ran to them, but Slick didn't care. He just screamed at Percival to open his eyes, and he better not fucking die cause Slick will very well kill him if he does.

Someone pushed past him them, shoved him aside and scooped the boy into his arms. He was screaming something along the same lines, and the resemblance was sort of uncanny... Must be his father or something. Slick didn't care. He didn't care when he was yanked to his feet and cuffed. He didn't care when they questioned him. He didn't care when they let him go. He didn't care when he flopped on his bed that night and didn't sleep. Not caring was something he was good at, so why did he not care about everything except Percival Stanford? And why did it hurt?

* * *

It's been two weeks. Two weeks in a hospital getting fed peas and corn and whatever else is easy with an IV drip in his arm and stupid TV shows to watch. Percy was bored. Hospitals sucked. Being too weak to sit up on his own sucked. Having the world not ruled by Trolls... probably amazing, and totally worth all the suckage he was getting. He just wished they'd allow more people to come visit him. So of course he was surprised when someone climbed in the window in the middle of the night.

“You look pathetic,” Spades Slick said, closing the window behind him.

“Slick, what the hell, this is the fifth story!” Percy hated how weak his voice sounded.

“I can climb.”

Percy let out a small noise resembling a chuckle and grinned against his will. “You know, I thought I was a goner. But, y'know I heard something. Sounded an awful lot like my name. Sounded an awful lot like you saying it.”

“Nah. Not me, Sleuth.” Slick rubbed his arm.

Percy pouted. “But I was so sure...”

“Shut the fuck up, Percival Stanford,” Slick growled. He covered Percy's idiotic grin with his own.


End file.
